tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post4821207327818107912..comments2023-07-06T11:50:15.086+01:00Comments on Just Keep Writing and Other Thoughts...: Clarification and Help requestAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02744937536946299450noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-21687142447903431562007-11-05T11:53:00.000+00:002007-11-05T11:53:00.000+00:00LOvely family, Liz. Enjoy!LOvely family, Liz. Enjoy!Janhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08627338108089464863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-72460130194248468382007-11-01T10:10:00.000+00:002007-11-01T10:10:00.000+00:00Thanks Philippa and Absolute. All the input helps...Thanks Philippa and Absolute. All the input helps.<BR/><BR/>Biddy, nothing needed other than sun block :-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02744937536946299450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-19347810337050998762007-11-01T09:16:00.000+00:002007-11-01T09:16:00.000+00:00Ha, I had exactly this problem a while back on my ...Ha, I had exactly this problem a while back on my current WIP. I eventually chose to leave out most of the hads. I included a few so that it was a apparent to the reader the scene was a flashback and then I took left them out - what I found was the scene became more immediate - and I think this is often important with flashbacks which can drag otherwise.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04871239587214383387noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-83431796443045788772007-11-01T08:39:00.000+00:002007-11-01T08:39:00.000+00:00Liz - very quick question, a friend of mine is vis...Liz - very quick question, a friend of mine is visiting Dubai soon and was wondering whether he needs any special jabs or treatment.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09749337741234916835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-54502950601484969282007-11-01T08:37:00.000+00:002007-11-01T08:37:00.000+00:00Liz. I actually do what Zinnia suggested. I'd swit...Liz. I actually do what Zinnia suggested. I'd switch into the past tense when you reach 'adorned'. I've got a huge flashback in JSY. It lasts for about one third of the book and I needed to switch over quite quickly from 'had'. Mind you, I haven't seen my edits yet so what do I know!Phillipahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06327571607067476569noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-73120098343871410242007-11-01T04:03:00.000+00:002007-11-01T04:03:00.000+00:00Thanks BE and Alyssa :-)Thanks BE and Alyssa :-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02744937536946299450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-50590007821299066662007-11-01T01:32:00.000+00:002007-11-01T01:32:00.000+00:00Hours ago when she stood in the doorway of the chu...Hours ago when she stood in the doorway of the church; all she could see were various shades of pink. Flowers and ribbons adorned every pew then, the altar barely visible for all the massed blooms in every shade of the wretched colour; particularly pale pink. Her fiancé, John, had stood among the flowers; tall, blond, perfect yet even he hadn't escaped the colour with a waistcoat matching the flower girls’ dresses. They'd spun around her knees with pink stinking lilies clutched in their fists.<BR/><BR/>In the first sentence, 'hours ago' makes the time obvious enough. Throw in a 'then' and some contractions farther down the paragraph and the time frame should be apparent. =oDB.E. Sandersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04336115135400388268noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-11631450092303566162007-11-01T00:14:00.000+00:002007-11-01T00:14:00.000+00:00How about 'Flowers and ribbons adoring every pew.....How about 'Flowers and ribbons adoring every pew...' and a few contractions: she'd...Alyssa Goodnighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12563271888054706202noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-59916522907851606542007-10-31T17:52:00.000+00:002007-10-31T17:52:00.000+00:00Thanks Zinnia and CS :-)Thanks Zinnia and CS :-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02744937536946299450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-35240182609548941322007-10-31T17:14:00.000+00:002007-10-31T17:14:00.000+00:00Ditto to the above. Start with had, then slip into...Ditto to the above. Start with had, then slip into simple past, coming back to the use of "had" right before the flashback ends.cs harrishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13708705800818667923noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-39525391477241067312007-10-31T12:03:00.000+00:002007-10-31T12:03:00.000+00:00I do it a different way (after reading sections on...I do it a different way (after reading sections on flashback in a couple of how-to books): I use 'had' (or equivalent contraction) the first two or three times, then slip seamlessly back into my usual syntax. Quite a few writers use this technique - I spot it regularly, now, in novels - and it seems to work; you take the reader with you. So: Hours ago when she had stood in the doorway of the church, all she'd been able to see were various shades of pink. Flowers and ribbons adorned every pew, the altar barely visible... Then I stay like that, on the whole, until the end of the flashback where I use something concrete/sensory from the present time to bring the characters - and the reader - back to the present. (BTW I'm not saying this is a *better* technique than Jan's, just offering an alternative; each has its own place, sometimes it's useful to mix-and-match, like when you have a flashback-within-a-flashback, and no doubt there are other methods too.)Zinnia Cyclamenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04841314997513292477noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-78230610455649539482007-10-31T11:47:00.000+00:002007-10-31T11:47:00.000+00:00I think you're right JJ. Must find out the neares...I think you're right JJ. Must find out the nearest soon :-)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02744937536946299450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-68232723553627524992007-10-31T11:25:00.000+00:002007-10-31T11:25:00.000+00:00Oooh, fantastic photo Liz. I bet you end up in an...Oooh, fantastic photo Liz. <BR/><BR/>I bet you end up in an internet cafe!<BR/><BR/>JJxJenny Beattiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00640209636605410939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-16818970783893641962007-10-31T10:44:00.000+00:002007-10-31T10:44:00.000+00:00Thanks Jan, you are a star :-)Thanks for the feedb...Thanks Jan, you are a star :-)<BR/><BR/>Thanks for the feedback Flowerpot...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02744937536946299450noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-52473061552424482692007-10-31T09:20:00.000+00:002007-10-31T09:20:00.000+00:00Yes I agree with Jan. Too many 'had's slow it all ...Yes I agree with Jan. Too many 'had's slow it all down. Just need enough to signify a flashback.Flowerpothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14102679179201725732noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-34330113.post-47003374372960037652007-10-31T07:28:00.000+00:002007-10-31T07:28:00.000+00:00I usually replace some by a contraction if possibl...I usually replace some by a contraction if possible.<BR/><BR/>So.........<BR/>Hours ago when she had stood in the doorway of the church, all <B>she'd</B> been able to see were various shades of pink. Flowers and ribbons had adorned every pew, the altar barely visible for all the massed blooms in every shade of the wretched colour; particularly pale pink. Her fiancé, John, had stood among the flowers; tall, blond, perfect, yet even he <B>hadn't</B> escaped the colour with a waistcoat matching the flower girls’ dresses. <B>They'd</B> spun around her knees with pink stinking lilies clutched in their fists.<BR/><BR/>And, at the risk of sounding nit-picky, I'd take out the <I>particularly pale pink</I> phrase. You're trying to be concise with the flashback and that extends the sentence and isn't necessary.<BR/><BR/>Just my opinion :)Jan Joneshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00471022034388834235noreply@blogger.com